Metro Rail Dupes Public, Changes Its Spots

Metrorail have undertaken to change the colour of its carriages to affect greater productivity amongst its workers after revelations of slow work had surfaced. 

For a long time, Metrorail’s train service has been riled by commuters for being lax. Facebook and Twitter are often abuzz with posts about train commuters venting their frustrations at being “late yet again for work”. While Metrorail cites cable theft as the main reason for delays, investigators believe this to be blatantly false.

An investigative report by a covert team, who monitored Metrorail workers, revealed that the workers had been working at a depressingly slow pace in preparing the trains for service. A psychologist, who researched the effects of colour, came to the conclusion that Metrorail’s yellow and grey colour scheme subliminally instils lax behaviour in employees.

Virtual image: Metrorail's new colour scheme

“Yellow on its own is a colour that inspires positivity.  This colour creates the social buzz; enticing workers to joviality and inspiring productivity. Grey sets a compromising tone; it’s a fence-sitter if you will, a transitionary colour which sets a drab mood.  The combination of the two colours creates a conflicting mish-mash of signals, causing confusion in the thought processes and productivity of the workers. The slow rate that they are working at can directly be attributed to the yellow and grey colours of the trains. It’s all subliminal".

The psychologist recommended to Metrorail that they use red, white and blue in combination. According to the psychologist, the red white and blue composition instils self-confidence. “It’s the reason why the United States of America and the United Kingdom are such world super powers”.

Meanwhile, Metrorail would have to account for their false claims to the Constitutional Court.